Author's note: This story includes explicit sexual content, involving descriptions of contact between an adult male and a boy below the age of consent. If you find this in any way offensive or distasteful, please read no further, and/or if it is illegal for you to read such material in your jurisdiction due to age or domicile, please read no further. The author does not condone or promote any illegal activity. This story is entirely a product of my imagination, no minors were involved in any way in its compilation, and the characters and actions portrayed are entirely fictitious. The characters in this story may not engage in safe sex, because, being fictitious, they don't need to. You, as a real person, do.
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I can't believe what happened today! I don't bloody believe it! My big bro....has....got....a....boyfriend!! Well, it looks like he has, anyway. I know he's gay, right, he told me months ago, even Mum and Dad know that, and they're fine with it, but knowing about something is way different to seeing it for yourself. Specially when you get back from swimming a bit early....and they're....snogging....on the sofa in the front room!! Chrissy had a huge bulge in the front of his jeans! And so did Si! I like Si, he's a really nice guy, so's Chrissy, too, I'm lucky to have such a great brother, some of my mates who have older brothers say what arseholes they are, so I know I'm a lot better off than most.
Anyway, if I'm going to write about all this stuff, and make it like a diary, or something, I'd better tell you a bit about me, and my bro, too. I'm Cameron, but no-one calls me that, except Mum and Dad when they're telling me off - everyone calls me Cammy. I'm 11, I'll be 12 just before Christmas. My brother, who's 15, is Christian, but good friends, and family - including me, of course - call him Chrissy. We live with our Mum and Dad, in a really nice house in West London, not far from the river. We're not rich, but we're definitely not poor, either, so I'm lucky in that way, too. Dad works in the City - no, he's not a greedy banker, by the way, just a hard working accountant - and Mum's a supply teacher, so she works some weeks, but not others, and gets school holidays off, which is pretty good, usually, because it means we get to do stuff and go places rather than just sitting around getting bored like some kids. Chrissy and I will be going to the same school after this summer holiday, because I've just finished primary. Chrissy is really clever, way at the top of his class in nearly every subject, and goes on 'gifted and talented' things all the time. That's how he met Si, Simon, that is, because Si lives a few miles away from us, and goes to a different school, they were both on a science course at one of the London Uni places a few months ago. Si is nearly 15, too, Chrissy says his birthday is in October, so he's in year 10 after the holidays, Chrissy will be in year 11.
Anyway, back to today. When I came in the front door, they can't have heard me, because they just carried on with....what they were doing, they didn't know I was there until I went in the front room. And I didn't know they were there, either, so it wasn't like I was spying on them. They didn't shout at me, or anything, like I said, they're both really nice guys, just looked....embarrassed. I said sorry for disturbing them, and went straight to my room. 'Cos I was pretty embarrassed, too! They went out not long after, I heard the front door go, and then, about half an hour later, Chrissy came back on his own. He came and knocked on my door - Mum and Dad always make us knock on bedroom or bathroom doors, if they're closed, and they always knock, too, they say everyone's entitled to their privacy - so I told him to come in. I started to say sorry again, in case he was mad at me, but he said not to worry, it wasn't my fault, they should've gone to his room. He asked me....what I thought about....what I'd seen. I said I was pretty surprised, because I thought Si was just another one of his friends - he has three or four mates who come round to our house quite often - but I wasn't bothered about it. It wasn't as though I didn't know he was gay, like I said. I asked him if Si was his....boyfriend. Chrissy said....he hoped so, 'cos he really likes Si, but that Si had to talk about it with....someone else, first. I asked Chrissy if he knew what that was all about, but he said no, Si had said he'd tell him everything once he'd had chance to think and talk about it. So it looks like Si has got a boyfriend already, maybe. You see boyfriends and girlfriends splitting up and then going out with someone else all the time, so I suppose it's the same for gay guys, too. Anyway, whatever happens, I'm not going to be nosey - if Chrissy wants to tell me stuff, he knows he can, and he knows I won't tell anyone else if he doesn't want me to, but if he doesn't want to tell me, that's all good, too. He's the same way with me. Like I say, he's a great big bro.
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Chrissy looks really, really happy tonight. He went out this afternoon, for an hour or so. He looked mega-nervous when he went out, and not much better when he got back. But then I heard his phone ring - my room's next to his, and he always has his ringtone on really loud, in case he's listening to music, or something like that - and, the next time I saw him, he was really smiley and relaxed. Looks like he's had some good news.
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It's official! Chrissy is going out with Si! He told me just now. He's told me a really big secret, though, too, about Si - it's alright, though, Si said he could tell me, as long as I don't tell anyone else. Si knows I can keep things quiet. It's a bit weird, though, I don't know what to think about it. Si did have a....friend, but not a boyfriend. It's a man....a fifty-odd year old man. I thought older men who liked boys were always creepy and disgusting, but Chrissy went with Si to meet this guy - he's called Tony - and says he's really, really nice, he loves Si to bits, but he's really happy that Si has found someone his own age to be with. Si told Chrissy that he'd been seeing Tony for about two years, so that means he was only 12 when they met. I'm nearly 12. It's made me think about stuff. About what I want to do. 'Cos I'm starting to wonder....when I see guys at swimming, in the changing rooms and stuff, I get....hard, sometimes. That time I saw Si and Chrissy in the front room....I got really hard. So, maybe....I might be gay, too. I'm going to talk to Chrissy about it, soon.
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I've just had a long talk with Si and Chrissy. Chrissy and I went swimming, we didn't have much else to do, 'cos Mum was on a course today, then Si came and met us afterwards. We went to the park by the river, and sat on one of the benches. We were just talking about general things at first, but then Si said something about Tony, so I thought it might be a good time to ask about....well, gay stuff. They were both really helpful, they didn't mind talking about it - I bet lots of guys would have just found it too embarrassing. Si's read loads about it on the net, 'cos he said he felt different right back to when he was in primary, but he was scared by it, and he wanted to try and find out more. Si said he thought he was gay when he was about my age, but he wasn't sure. He's sure now, though, he said. Chrissy said he didn't think about it much until about a year or so ago, when some of his mates started getting serious girlfriends. He went out with this girl, Sarah, for a while, I met her a couple of times, she was pretty good looking, but he said that when they were kissing and all that, it didn't feel right to him, he couldn't explain it any better than that. Then he went to a party, and met a guy called Paul, they ended up....sort of....snogging. Chrissy said he found it way more....exciting than being with Sarah, so then he started trying to find out more about it, too. He even talked to Mum about it, I don't think I'd have had the bottle to do that, even though Mum's really nice and easy to talk to. Anyway, Si and Chrissy both told me not to worry too much about it, lots of boys like other boys when they're younger, and still end up straight, but if I was gay, it wasn't a big deal, I was still the same person who could do the same stuff as I do now. I wasn't really that worried, 'cos I'm probably too young to do sex stuff in any case, but it's still good to have someone to talk to about it. And if I get hard-ons at swimming, it doesn't mean much - except that I'm a typical horny boy!
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I had another talk today, but just with Si this time. He came round to see Chrissy after school - we started back a couple of weeks ago - but Chrissy was late getting back, 'cos he had a meeting with some other guys and one of the teachers about starting a chess club, and then his bus got stuck in a traffic jam, there'd been an accident, or something. He texted Si, and told him to wait for him at ours. So, 'cos I was already in, we started talking. Like I said before, I'm not usually nosey, but I....wanted to ask Si something, so I said did he mind, and he said he didn't. So I asked him....about Tony, about how they met, and stuff. Si looked really seriously at me, and said he'd tell me, but I had to promise never to say anything about it to anyone else, even by accident. I asked why, and he said Tony could get into really big trouble, even go to prison, if anyone found out, and that Tony was his best friend and he really loved him, and Tony really loved Si, too. Si said that he never wanted anything bad to happen to Tony, and that was why I had to promise. So I did. Then Si told me how they first met, Si noticed Tony looking at him while he was walking past a pub where Tony was having a drink on a sunny afternoon, Si smiled at him, Tony smiled back, and they just started talking, mostly about football. Then, after a few weeks of getting to know each other, and after Si had found a website with stories about boys and men doing sex stuff, Si went down to Tony's place - he lives about 20 miles away, down in Surrey, but he works near where Si lives - and Si asked Tony if he'd teach him about sex. Tony didn't want to, at first, not because he didn't fancy Si, but because he didn't want to hurt him. Si persuaded him, though, and he said that Tony taught him all sorts of stuff, and they did most of it! Si said how much fun it was, and how much they both liked it. Now that Si is going out with Chrissy, though, he doesn't do stuff with Tony anymore - Tony said that was the right thing to do. They're still best friends, though. As Si was telling me about it, I started to feel really strange, sort of excited and nervous and fluttery inside all at the same time - and really, really horny! After Chrissy got in, Si went up to his room with him, and I was left in the front room on my own. And I started thinking. About Tony. And me.
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It's Mum and Dad's twentieth wedding anniversary this weekend, and they're going to a classical music concert, one they both really want to see, on Sunday. But it's in Birmingham, so they'll be gone all day, and not back until late at night. They had a talk with Chrissy and I about what we wanted to do, and we decided we'd have a quiet day at home, but that we wanted to go out somewhere for lunch, because neither of us can cook much, and we didn't just want to go to McDonalds or somewhere like that. So they reserved a table for us at a restaurant we've been to with them before. Chrissy asked if Si could go, and they said yes, so they ended up getting a table for four, in case I wanted to invite someone, too. And there was somebody I wanted to invite, but not somebody Mum and Dad would expect. Or be very pleased about, I suppose. Si and I had talked about it, and Si said he thought it would work out alright. Chrissy was OK with it, too. Because I've decided I want to meet Tony. And ask him something.
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I got really nervous yesterday, thinking about meeting Tony, and saying what I want to say to him. I've told Si and Chrissy about it, so they won't get a surprise, Si grinned when I told him, he said he thinks Tony will be happy, but he told me as well not to be too disappointed if it doesn't go like I hope it will. My nerves have gone away now, I've got it all sorted in my head. Chrissy's calling me, it's time to go to the restaurant.
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Wow! Wow, wow, wow, wow, WOW! Now I know what all the fuss is about!
Today has just been amazing, about the most amazing day of my life so far. We went out just after midday, our table was booked for 12:30. Chrissy and I walked down there, and met Si outside. I must've looked disappointed when I didn't see Tony, but Si said not to worry, he'll be here in a few minutes, he's on his way on the bus. We went in and found our table, and then this guy walked into the restaurant. I didn't think it was him at first, because he didn't look that old at all - he was pretty tall, and a bit fat, but not gross or anything, a little bit of grey hair, but mostly brown, hardly any wrinkles or anything. He didn't look any older than my dad, who's 45. Then he saw Si, and smiled, really smiled - you could tell straight away how much he loves Si. But then he saw me. He just looked and looked. As though he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Mum has always said I'm really good looking, but mums say that kind of stuff all the time, so I've never taken much notice. I looked at Si, and he was grinning like a maniac. Then Si introduced us - he told Tony my full name, so I decided to tell him straight away to call me Cammy, and then I just kept talking, I didn't feel shy or nervous or anything, Tony just didn't make me feel that way. I said Si had told me all about him, and that I wanted him to teach me the things that he's taught Si, if he didn't mind, and that we were all going back to ours after lunch, because Mum and Dad weren't there, so we could get to know each other better. Tony just looked gobsmacked for a minute, but then I saw Si wink at him, and Tony got a big smile on his face. I knew then that things were going to be alright. I didn't know how good it was going to get, though.
Lunch was OK, but I didn't pay too much attention to it - I was a bit impatient, I suppose, and wanted to get back home, to see what would happen. The others took their time, though, so I just had to wait until they were ready. Tony was a bit worried about going back to ours, in case anyone saw him and told Mum and Dad, but Si and Chrissy said it would be OK, they'd just say he was Si's uncle, or something, if anyone asked, 'cos no-one round our way knows Si apart from us, anyway. In the end, we got home at about 3:00. Si and Chrissy went up to Chrissy's room more or less straight away, 'cos they wanted some private time, so I was left in the front room with Tony. He sat on the sofa, so I went and sat next to him. We talked a little bit, about nothing, really, but then he asked me what I meant in the restaurant, what sort of things did I think he could teach me. Just for a minute, I felt butterflies in my tummy, but Tony's voice was so kind and gentle that they soon went away, and I was able to tell him....what I was thinking about. He asked me....if I knew what a boylover was, so I said, yeah, sort of, a man who likes to do sex stuff with boys. Then he said it wasn't just about sex, it was about loving and caring for boys, too, and not doing anything that would hurt a boy, never doing anything that the boy didn't want. Then he asked me if I'd ever done anything, any sex stuff, so I said no, not really, just getting hard-ons, and touching myself a bit....but I wanted to do more. I sort of snuggled up against him, and he put his arm around me. I looked up at him, and he smiled, and I just felt....loved and wanted. It was great. I knew what I wanted to do, so I did it. I reached up and kissed him. He smiled again, and hugged me closer. I felt so relaxed, and I was starting to get....excited, too. I whispered in Tony's ear that I was....really hard, and that I wanted him....to touch me. He asked me if I was really sure, and I said I was. I took his hand, and put it in my lap. He started to stroke me gently, through my trousers. Even that felt really good, but I guessed it would feel even better if he could touch right on my....dick, so I undid the button and zip, and pushed my bum off the seat so I could pull my trousers and undies down and take them off. Tony stopped, and just looked at me, looked at my....boy bits, like he'd never seen anything so nice in his life. I'm not very big down there, it's only about seven or eight centimetres long, even when it's hard, and I haven't got any hairs yet, but Chrissy told me he was like that until he was about 13, and then his started growing really quickly, so I'm not worried about it, or anything. In any case, like I said, Tony seemed to like it. He asked if he could touch it, so I said, yeah, of course, that was what I wanted him to do. He started rubbing it softly, between one of his fingers and his thumb, moving the skin backwards and forwards over the head part. I couldn't believe how good it felt, it was like I was itching inside, and Tony's hand was scratching the itch. Then he started concentrating on the underneath of it, where the skin joins, running his fingertip over that bit, and that felt even better! I started to get this really weird feeling inside me, sort of mega-ticklish, sort of like I really badly needed to pee, but I knew it wasn't that, I wasn't actually going to pee. Then it happened! It was like my insides were exploding, my dick felt like it was melting, it started jerking all over the place. It was soooo good, and it kept going for what felt like ages, then stopped for a few seconds, but Tony was still stroking gently, and it started again! It wasn't quite as good as the first one, and didn't last as long, but it was still pretty bloody fantastic! This time, though, it started to feel too tickly, so I asked Tony to stop for a minute. He cuddled me again, and asked if I'd ever had that feeling before, so I said no, but I wanted to have it again, really soon!! He explained what had happened, that I'd had an....orgasm - two, actually, he said sometimes boys who hadn't started making sperms yet could have more than one at a time, but once the sperms, and the stuff they swim in, start coming out, most older boys and men had to wait a while to recover in between. I was still just as hard as before, and the tickling had gone away, so I asked Tony to make me have another one. He said he was going to show me something different, and that I wasn't to worry, he wouldn't hurt me. And then he did something I couldn't believe! He knelt down in front of me, and put my dick in his mouth! Then he started licking and sucking it, and I really couldn't believe it, because it felt ten times better than when he was doing it with his fingers! It felt so good, I couldn't even think straight, it was like his mouth and my dick were the only things in the whole world. It went on getting better and better, until I didn't think I could stand it anymore. I nearly told him to stop, but then I started having another orgasm thing, and this one was huge! I felt like I was turning inside out! It soon got too tickly again, though, but Tony seemed to know, and he stopped sucking, and just held it still in his mouth for a few seconds, then let me go. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, and I nearly did both, but, in the end, I just put my arms around Tony's neck, and kissed him. He opened his mouth a bit, and I could feel his tongue on my lips, so I sort of copied him, and our tongues touched together softly. It felt really nice, really....sexy, like we couldn't get any closer together. Tony laid down on the rug in front of the sofa, and I laid on top of him. We kissed a few times, then he lifted my head up a little bit, and looked at me really seriously. He asked me if I was still sure about doing stuff, and did I know that I could say 'no' or 'stop' whenever I wanted. So I said I did, but I said that if sex was this much fun all the time, I never wanted to stop! We laid there and talked for a while, I asked Tony some questions, and he explained everything to me, told me the proper words, like penis, and semen, for sex things, but he told me the slang words too - I'd heard quite a few of them at school, but didn't know what some of them meant. My dick had gone soft for a while, but it started to get hard again, especially when Tony was stroking my back, and down onto my bum. I wriggled about a bit, and that was when I noticed his hard-on pressing against my leg. It made me feel a bit selfish, that I'd had all that fun and the great feelings, while he'd had nothing, so I asked him if I could see his....dick, and touch it, and make him feel good, too. He said he'd had loads of fun making me feel good, and that I never had to think I had to do anything for him, just because he'd done stuff for me. I told him I wanted to, though - I wanted to see what his looked like, apart from anything else. I'd had a few glimpses of older guys getting changed at the pool, and even my dad a couple of times, but I'd never really had the chance to properly look at grown-up bits. Especially not a grown-up with a hard-on. It looked pretty big from the bulge in his trousers, but Chrissy's bulge when he was horny was just as big. I asked Tony about that, and he said his wasn't that long, for a grown-up, a bit below average, but pretty fat. I asked if I could see it, and he said yes, if I wanted to, so I undid his trousers and pulled them down about halfway, and then pulled his undies down too. He had loads of hair down there, and his dick was just like he'd said, short but fat - and very hard. I squeezed it a bit, and he smiled, and then I started to stroke it, like he'd done to me before. My fingers only just about went all the way around it. There was some slippery stuff leaking out of the pee hole, and I asked Tony if that was semen, but he said no, that was something that the body made to help the penis slide in more easily when a man had sex, and that most people called it 'precum'. The actual semen came out when a man had his orgasm. I asked if he was going to have an orgasm, and he said he would soon if I kept making him feel as good as I was doing, but I didn't have to. I liked the feeling of his dick in my hand, though, it was hard inside, but the skin was really smooth and silky, and I liked the idea of making him feel good, too, so I said I wanted to carry on. He smiled again, and said thank you, and that he'd warn me when it was about to happen, because he thought it was going to be a big one, and it could get pretty messy. I stroked it a bit faster, and his breathing got faster, too, and then he said he was 'cumming', so I went even faster. He pulled his shirt up out of the way, and then his dick jerked, really strongly, in my hand, and this white gooey stuff shot out, way up in the air, then landed on my hand and his bits. It made me jump, and I took my hand away, but his dick kept on jerking, four or five more times, more of the stuff coming out with each jerk. The last couple were just little dribbles, though, and then it stopped. There was loads, it looked like, all over Tony's dick and hairs, and even up on his tummy. Tony got his breath back, and said thank you to me, said how great I'd made him feel. I sort of sniffed at the stuff that had gone on my hand, it smelled different from anything else I'd smelt before, and it made me wonder what it might taste like, so I just licked a tiny bit, but I didn't like it much. I told Tony, and he said if I didn't like it, I didn't have to have it in my mouth, that anyone doing any sex stuff should only do what they're comfortable with, and no-one should ever try and force them to do anything they weren't happy to do. I looked around for something to clean up with, but there wasn't much I could use, so I quickly went in the kitchen, even though I didn't have any trousers or undies on, and got some paper towels. We both cleaned Tony's stuff off of us, and then laid down and cuddled again. It was like hugging a big, warm teddy bear, I loved it, and I loved it when Tony started getting hard again, it was really sexy to feel his dick growing against my leg, it made me get really hard again, too. He gently put his hand down over my bum and between my legs, and stroked his fingers across the underneath of my balls and the bit between there and my bum hole, and even on my bum hole itself. It tickled, but it was such a nice tickle, it made me feel great. I asked him if he wouldn't mind sucking me again, because that was the best feeling I'd ever had, and he said of course he didn't mind, he loved making me feel good. He got me to slide up and sit on his chest, and we put some cushions on the floor to lift his head up a bit, and he got me in his mouth again. He went really slowly, made it last ages, and it felt fantastic, almost like I was having one long nearly-orgasm, but then it suddenly washed over me like a big wave, and I was....cumming, and cumming, and cumming some more. I think I had two orgasms again, but it was all just so good it was difficult to tell. After I'd finished, Tony just held me in his mouth for a long time, until it started to go soft, then he kissed the end of it, and let me go. My body still felt like there were echoes of the orgasm going through it, I felt all warm and tingly, and really sleepy. Tony whispered that we should get dressed, and then we could hug some more, if I wanted to, so we did, and laid back on the sofa. The next thing I remember, I woke up to see Si and Chrissy looking down at me, smiling. Tony was smiling, too, like he couldn't get any happier. Then it was time for Si and Tony to go, so we all walked down to the bus stop together. I really wanted to kiss Tony goodbye, but I knew I couldn't, not out in the street, so I just gave him a quick hug, like he was my uncle or something, and he gently mussed my hair. I said I wanted to see him again, really soon, and he said he wanted to see me again, too, and he'd see what he could work out. I nearly cried when the bus went, and he waved, but, when I thought about what had happened, and how much fun it had all been, I got a huge grin on my face, instead.
And now it's bedtime, and writing about today has made me really horny again. But now Tony has taught me how, I know exactly what to do about that!!
****
I'm going Christmas shopping with Si and Chrissy on Saturday afternoon - at least, that's what Mum and Dad think. What's really happening is that I'm going to meet up with Tony when he finishes work at lunchtime, and going down to his place for the afternoon, then coming back at teatime to meet up with Si and Chrissy again. They're going to do my shopping for me, I've made a list. I've managed to see Tony a couple of times since half term, including one really fun day when we all went to Si's house when his mum and dad were at work, but it's turned out to be harder than I thought for us to get together. Like Si said, Tony could really get in trouble over all this, so we have to be mega-careful. I'm really looking forward to Saturday, though. Si showed me the website, the one with the stories he read before he started doing sex stuff with Tony, some of the stories are really horrible, with boys getting hurt, and treated really badly, but some of them are really sexy, and loving at the same time, and that's how Tony is with me, and Si says he was just the same with him, too. There's one thing I really want to try, but Si said Tony probably won't do it. I've been sort of....practising, though, and it feels really good, so I'm going to ask him anyway. If he says no, then I'll have to accept that. I hope he says yes, though.
****
Yesssss! It's been another 'WOW!' day, it's been so much fun!
Like Si guessed, Tony did say no - at first, anyway. He said he would hurt me, badly, and there was no way he would ever do that. So I told him about my 'practice', about what I'd done, and how much I liked it, and how I really wanted to do it for real, with him. He said no again, but I could tell he was at least thinking about it, and that he probably did want to do it, really, but was just being kind and thinking of me and not wanting to hurt me. So I said let's try, and if it hurts, I'll tell you, and we can stop. He didn't say anything to that, so I sort of....took charge. He had some....lube stuff in the drawer of his bedside table, so I made myself and him really slippery, and I got on top. It was a bit fiddly trying to get everything lined up, but Tony helped me, and I began to sit down on his dick. It did hurt, quite a bit, when the head went in, but I tried not to let it show, because I knew Tony would make me stop - and I didn't want to. I just waited, like I did the first time I used the handle of the old hairbrush, until I got used to it, and then started slowly moving down, and letting Tony go deeper inside me. He rubbed against my sensitive spot, the something-gland, inside, it felt soooo good, I nearly cummed straight away, and it didn't hurt at all after that, it just felt brilliant, his dick felt hot and made me feel full, it was soooo sexy. Soon he was in all the way, and I could feel his hairs up against my bum and balls. His eyes were closed, and he was biting his lip, he looked like he was in heaven. I moved my bum up a little bit, and back down again, and Tony groaned, really loudly. I was afraid I was hurting him, so I asked him if he was alright, and he said he'd never felt anything better in his whole life. I was so proud of myself, making him feel so good, and it was feeling fantastic for me, too. I started going slowly up and down, Tony was sort of holding round my waist, helping me, and soon he was moaning all the time, and telling me how wonderful it felt. He was right, too, it was just amazing, every time I moved it felt like I was nearly cumming, and then I really did cum, it felt like I was cumming from right inside my bum, from that gland place. That set Tony off too, and he called out my name, really loudly, and then I felt his dick get even bigger and harder, it started jerking inside me, over and over again. I was still cumming, even after he finished, so I kept him inside me, as deep as he could go, and wriggled about to keep my cum going as long as I could. It lasted a few more seconds, but then it finally stopped. Tony's eyes were still closed, he looked half-dead, it was a bit scary for a minute, but then he smiled, sort of sleepily, like he'd just woken up from the best dream he'd ever had. He sort of sat up a bit, so he could hug me tightly, even while he was still inside me. Then he said something that I really didn't expect, but something that made me feel soooo good inside - he told me he loved me. I mean, I knew he liked me, and fancied me, but it was obvious that Si was the one he really loved. Just for a second, I nearly asked him whether he loved me more than Si, but I'm glad I stopped myself, because that wouldn't have been fair on Tony, to make him choose like that. So I just kissed him, and told him I loved him, too, and that I'd loved my first time having him inside me. Tony had started to go soft by this time, and sort of squidged out of me, and I suddenly felt really gooey inside, with all his stuff being up there, so I said I needed to go to the toilet. He agreed, and said we both needed a shower, too, so we headed off to the bathroom, me wrapped up in towels, and Tony in his dressing gown. I'd never had a shower with someone else before, so after I'd sat on the toilet and got rid of his stuff out of my bum, I asked Tony if we could shower together. He grinned, and said he'd love to. It was great fun, we played around a bit, splashing each other, and then he washed me, really gently and carefully, especially round my bum, which was a tiny bit sore, but nowhere near as bad as it was after my first time with the hairbrush, 'cos I was too rough with myself and didn't use enough slippery stuff that time. Then I washed Tony, too, and he must've liked the feeling, because he soon got hard. I asked him if he wanted to....put it inside me again, but he said no, it was my turn now. I couldn't believe my ears, I never thought he'd want me to do that to him, but he said he couldn't wait, so we went straight back to his room, because I couldn't wait, either, I was so excited to try it! It was a bit awkward finding the right position, with him being quite big, and me only having a little dick, but we managed it - he got on his hands and knees, and stuck his bum up as high as he could, I smeared the lube on him and me, and I put my dick straight in him. It felt great, especially when Tony used the muscles in his bum to squeeze me! I went in and out, over and over again, until I had a massive cum, and then a second one, not quite as big, but still amazing! I want to be able to make sperms, because it's part of growing up, but I'll miss not being able to have more than one cum at a time! After that, we just cuddled on Tony's bed for a while, and had a little sleep all wrapped up together. I woke up before Tony, all snuggled up in his arms, and I felt so safe and loved, it was wonderful. Those people who hate boylovers, who say they just hurt boys for their own selfish reasons, should have been me just then, they might understand things a bit better, that someone like Tony, who really loves boys, can make a boy feel so wanted and special and cared for. Really worth something. I have fantastic parents, and a great life, but still Tony gives me a sort of love my mum and dad couldn't.
I couldn't stop smiling when I met up with Si and Chrissy after Tony dropped me off back at the station near Si's house. They knew something special had happened, but they didn't try and find out what it was. I bet they guessed easily enough, anyway. Not that we keep secrets, Tony certainly didn't ask me to keep quiet - he never does, but he knows he doesn't have to - but we all know some things are private, so we don't ask. Even now, hours later, I'm still grinning my head off every time I think about what happened at Tony's - here I am, not even 12 until next week, and I'm not a virgin anymore. Either way!
****
Something awful's happened. Si is in Chrissy's room, crying and crying. I've been crying a lot, too, but I can't let anyone see, especially not Mum and Dad. Tony's died - he was at the football with Si yesterday, and had a heart attack, at least, that's what they think it was. I didn't know, but Si said Tony had had a heart condition for years, he had to take pills every day because of it. It was so terrible for Si, not just because he was there when it happened, but because when he went to the hospital, they wouldn't let him see Tony, because he wasn't family. And then Tony died in the middle of the night. I....I don't know what else to say....or what to do. I'm going to miss him so much.
****
Hi, Cam here again (not Cammy anymore, it sounded a bit....too....childish, I guess). I've just found this diary I wrote when I was 11/12 - it seems such a long time ago, even though it's only five years or so. I've never forgotten Tony, or what happened, though, and reading what I wrote at the time makes it seem like I was right back there again. I bet some people would think that now I'm older, I would look back at Tony, and hate him, think that he abused me, but I definitely don't. He was a wonderful, loving man, who cared so much about me, and the sex we had was what we both wanted, I enjoyed it so much, and I don't regret it at all. I've pretty much worked out now that I'm bisexual, I've had girlfriends and boyfriends, and had fun times with both. I've got a girlfriend, Livvy, at the moment, she knows I'm bi, and accepts that, and I think this time it might be more serious, a long term thing. Who knows, though? I'm still at school, doing my A-levels next year, I'm not thinking of getting married any time soon, or anything like that. Talking of which, Si and Chrissy are still together, they both got into Oxford, Si is doing Physics, Chrissy is doing Maths. They're engaged, hoping to get married, if the long-promised but still awaited marriage equality laws ever get passed. And they're still two of the nicest guys you could ever hope to meet, I love them both to bits.
I hope you enjoy reading my story, and I hope it makes you think, too - the stereotypes, about boylovers all being vile predators, are just plain wrong, as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, there are some awful people out in the world, who do want to hurt and abuse others, and they should be stopped, and, if necessary, punished. But there are others, and I'm certain Tony wasn't the only one, who really love, care for and cherish boys, and can give them wonderful life experiences, and not just in a sexual way, either. People should be judged on their merits, and not by unthinking reactions.
Love to you all
Cam xxxx
****
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
****
I can't believe what happened today! I don't bloody believe it! My big bro....has....got....a....boyfriend!! Well, it looks like he has, anyway. I know he's gay, right, he told me months ago, even Mum and Dad know that, and they're fine with it, but knowing about something is way different to seeing it for yourself. Specially when you get back from swimming a bit early....and they're....snogging....on the sofa in the front room!! Chrissy had a huge bulge in the front of his jeans! And so did Si! I like Si, he's a really nice guy, so's Chrissy, too, I'm lucky to have such a great brother, some of my mates who have older brothers say what arseholes they are, so I know I'm a lot better off than most.
Anyway, if I'm going to write about all this stuff, and make it like a diary, or something, I'd better tell you a bit about me, and my bro, too. I'm Cameron, but no-one calls me that, except Mum and Dad when they're telling me off - everyone calls me Cammy. I'm 11, I'll be 12 just before Christmas. My brother, who's 15, is Christian, but good friends, and family - including me, of course - call him Chrissy. We live with our Mum and Dad, in a really nice house in West London, not far from the river. We're not rich, but we're definitely not poor, either, so I'm lucky in that way, too. Dad works in the City - no, he's not a greedy banker, by the way, just a hard working accountant - and Mum's a supply teacher, so she works some weeks, but not others, and gets school holidays off, which is pretty good, usually, because it means we get to do stuff and go places rather than just sitting around getting bored like some kids. Chrissy and I will be going to the same school after this summer holiday, because I've just finished primary. Chrissy is really clever, way at the top of his class in nearly every subject, and goes on 'gifted and talented' things all the time. That's how he met Si, Simon, that is, because Si lives a few miles away from us, and goes to a different school, they were both on a science course at one of the London Uni places a few months ago. Si is nearly 15, too, Chrissy says his birthday is in October, so he's in year 10 after the holidays, Chrissy will be in year 11.
Anyway, back to today. When I came in the front door, they can't have heard me, because they just carried on with....what they were doing, they didn't know I was there until I went in the front room. And I didn't know they were there, either, so it wasn't like I was spying on them. They didn't shout at me, or anything, like I said, they're both really nice guys, just looked....embarrassed. I said sorry for disturbing them, and went straight to my room. 'Cos I was pretty embarrassed, too! They went out not long after, I heard the front door go, and then, about half an hour later, Chrissy came back on his own. He came and knocked on my door - Mum and Dad always make us knock on bedroom or bathroom doors, if they're closed, and they always knock, too, they say everyone's entitled to their privacy - so I told him to come in. I started to say sorry again, in case he was mad at me, but he said not to worry, it wasn't my fault, they should've gone to his room. He asked me....what I thought about....what I'd seen. I said I was pretty surprised, because I thought Si was just another one of his friends - he has three or four mates who come round to our house quite often - but I wasn't bothered about it. It wasn't as though I didn't know he was gay, like I said. I asked him if Si was his....boyfriend. Chrissy said....he hoped so, 'cos he really likes Si, but that Si had to talk about it with....someone else, first. I asked Chrissy if he knew what that was all about, but he said no, Si had said he'd tell him everything once he'd had chance to think and talk about it. So it looks like Si has got a boyfriend already, maybe. You see boyfriends and girlfriends splitting up and then going out with someone else all the time, so I suppose it's the same for gay guys, too. Anyway, whatever happens, I'm not going to be nosey - if Chrissy wants to tell me stuff, he knows he can, and he knows I won't tell anyone else if he doesn't want me to, but if he doesn't want to tell me, that's all good, too. He's the same way with me. Like I say, he's a great big bro.
****
Chrissy looks really, really happy tonight. He went out this afternoon, for an hour or so. He looked mega-nervous when he went out, and not much better when he got back. But then I heard his phone ring - my room's next to his, and he always has his ringtone on really loud, in case he's listening to music, or something like that - and, the next time I saw him, he was really smiley and relaxed. Looks like he's had some good news.
****
It's official! Chrissy is going out with Si! He told me just now. He's told me a really big secret, though, too, about Si - it's alright, though, Si said he could tell me, as long as I don't tell anyone else. Si knows I can keep things quiet. It's a bit weird, though, I don't know what to think about it. Si did have a....friend, but not a boyfriend. It's a man....a fifty-odd year old man. I thought older men who liked boys were always creepy and disgusting, but Chrissy went with Si to meet this guy - he's called Tony - and says he's really, really nice, he loves Si to bits, but he's really happy that Si has found someone his own age to be with. Si told Chrissy that he'd been seeing Tony for about two years, so that means he was only 12 when they met. I'm nearly 12. It's made me think about stuff. About what I want to do. 'Cos I'm starting to wonder....when I see guys at swimming, in the changing rooms and stuff, I get....hard, sometimes. That time I saw Si and Chrissy in the front room....I got really hard. So, maybe....I might be gay, too. I'm going to talk to Chrissy about it, soon.
****
I've just had a long talk with Si and Chrissy. Chrissy and I went swimming, we didn't have much else to do, 'cos Mum was on a course today, then Si came and met us afterwards. We went to the park by the river, and sat on one of the benches. We were just talking about general things at first, but then Si said something about Tony, so I thought it might be a good time to ask about....well, gay stuff. They were both really helpful, they didn't mind talking about it - I bet lots of guys would have just found it too embarrassing. Si's read loads about it on the net, 'cos he said he felt different right back to when he was in primary, but he was scared by it, and he wanted to try and find out more. Si said he thought he was gay when he was about my age, but he wasn't sure. He's sure now, though, he said. Chrissy said he didn't think about it much until about a year or so ago, when some of his mates started getting serious girlfriends. He went out with this girl, Sarah, for a while, I met her a couple of times, she was pretty good looking, but he said that when they were kissing and all that, it didn't feel right to him, he couldn't explain it any better than that. Then he went to a party, and met a guy called Paul, they ended up....sort of....snogging. Chrissy said he found it way more....exciting than being with Sarah, so then he started trying to find out more about it, too. He even talked to Mum about it, I don't think I'd have had the bottle to do that, even though Mum's really nice and easy to talk to. Anyway, Si and Chrissy both told me not to worry too much about it, lots of boys like other boys when they're younger, and still end up straight, but if I was gay, it wasn't a big deal, I was still the same person who could do the same stuff as I do now. I wasn't really that worried, 'cos I'm probably too young to do sex stuff in any case, but it's still good to have someone to talk to about it. And if I get hard-ons at swimming, it doesn't mean much - except that I'm a typical horny boy!
****
I had another talk today, but just with Si this time. He came round to see Chrissy after school - we started back a couple of weeks ago - but Chrissy was late getting back, 'cos he had a meeting with some other guys and one of the teachers about starting a chess club, and then his bus got stuck in a traffic jam, there'd been an accident, or something. He texted Si, and told him to wait for him at ours. So, 'cos I was already in, we started talking. Like I said before, I'm not usually nosey, but I....wanted to ask Si something, so I said did he mind, and he said he didn't. So I asked him....about Tony, about how they met, and stuff. Si looked really seriously at me, and said he'd tell me, but I had to promise never to say anything about it to anyone else, even by accident. I asked why, and he said Tony could get into really big trouble, even go to prison, if anyone found out, and that Tony was his best friend and he really loved him, and Tony really loved Si, too. Si said that he never wanted anything bad to happen to Tony, and that was why I had to promise. So I did. Then Si told me how they first met, Si noticed Tony looking at him while he was walking past a pub where Tony was having a drink on a sunny afternoon, Si smiled at him, Tony smiled back, and they just started talking, mostly about football. Then, after a few weeks of getting to know each other, and after Si had found a website with stories about boys and men doing sex stuff, Si went down to Tony's place - he lives about 20 miles away, down in Surrey, but he works near where Si lives - and Si asked Tony if he'd teach him about sex. Tony didn't want to, at first, not because he didn't fancy Si, but because he didn't want to hurt him. Si persuaded him, though, and he said that Tony taught him all sorts of stuff, and they did most of it! Si said how much fun it was, and how much they both liked it. Now that Si is going out with Chrissy, though, he doesn't do stuff with Tony anymore - Tony said that was the right thing to do. They're still best friends, though. As Si was telling me about it, I started to feel really strange, sort of excited and nervous and fluttery inside all at the same time - and really, really horny! After Chrissy got in, Si went up to his room with him, and I was left in the front room on my own. And I started thinking. About Tony. And me.
****
It's Mum and Dad's twentieth wedding anniversary this weekend, and they're going to a classical music concert, one they both really want to see, on Sunday. But it's in Birmingham, so they'll be gone all day, and not back until late at night. They had a talk with Chrissy and I about what we wanted to do, and we decided we'd have a quiet day at home, but that we wanted to go out somewhere for lunch, because neither of us can cook much, and we didn't just want to go to McDonalds or somewhere like that. So they reserved a table for us at a restaurant we've been to with them before. Chrissy asked if Si could go, and they said yes, so they ended up getting a table for four, in case I wanted to invite someone, too. And there was somebody I wanted to invite, but not somebody Mum and Dad would expect. Or be very pleased about, I suppose. Si and I had talked about it, and Si said he thought it would work out alright. Chrissy was OK with it, too. Because I've decided I want to meet Tony. And ask him something.
****
I got really nervous yesterday, thinking about meeting Tony, and saying what I want to say to him. I've told Si and Chrissy about it, so they won't get a surprise, Si grinned when I told him, he said he thinks Tony will be happy, but he told me as well not to be too disappointed if it doesn't go like I hope it will. My nerves have gone away now, I've got it all sorted in my head. Chrissy's calling me, it's time to go to the restaurant.
****
Wow! Wow, wow, wow, wow, WOW! Now I know what all the fuss is about!
Today has just been amazing, about the most amazing day of my life so far. We went out just after midday, our table was booked for 12:30. Chrissy and I walked down there, and met Si outside. I must've looked disappointed when I didn't see Tony, but Si said not to worry, he'll be here in a few minutes, he's on his way on the bus. We went in and found our table, and then this guy walked into the restaurant. I didn't think it was him at first, because he didn't look that old at all - he was pretty tall, and a bit fat, but not gross or anything, a little bit of grey hair, but mostly brown, hardly any wrinkles or anything. He didn't look any older than my dad, who's 45. Then he saw Si, and smiled, really smiled - you could tell straight away how much he loves Si. But then he saw me. He just looked and looked. As though he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Mum has always said I'm really good looking, but mums say that kind of stuff all the time, so I've never taken much notice. I looked at Si, and he was grinning like a maniac. Then Si introduced us - he told Tony my full name, so I decided to tell him straight away to call me Cammy, and then I just kept talking, I didn't feel shy or nervous or anything, Tony just didn't make me feel that way. I said Si had told me all about him, and that I wanted him to teach me the things that he's taught Si, if he didn't mind, and that we were all going back to ours after lunch, because Mum and Dad weren't there, so we could get to know each other better. Tony just looked gobsmacked for a minute, but then I saw Si wink at him, and Tony got a big smile on his face. I knew then that things were going to be alright. I didn't know how good it was going to get, though.
Lunch was OK, but I didn't pay too much attention to it - I was a bit impatient, I suppose, and wanted to get back home, to see what would happen. The others took their time, though, so I just had to wait until they were ready. Tony was a bit worried about going back to ours, in case anyone saw him and told Mum and Dad, but Si and Chrissy said it would be OK, they'd just say he was Si's uncle, or something, if anyone asked, 'cos no-one round our way knows Si apart from us, anyway. In the end, we got home at about 3:00. Si and Chrissy went up to Chrissy's room more or less straight away, 'cos they wanted some private time, so I was left in the front room with Tony. He sat on the sofa, so I went and sat next to him. We talked a little bit, about nothing, really, but then he asked me what I meant in the restaurant, what sort of things did I think he could teach me. Just for a minute, I felt butterflies in my tummy, but Tony's voice was so kind and gentle that they soon went away, and I was able to tell him....what I was thinking about. He asked me....if I knew what a boylover was, so I said, yeah, sort of, a man who likes to do sex stuff with boys. Then he said it wasn't just about sex, it was about loving and caring for boys, too, and not doing anything that would hurt a boy, never doing anything that the boy didn't want. Then he asked me if I'd ever done anything, any sex stuff, so I said no, not really, just getting hard-ons, and touching myself a bit....but I wanted to do more. I sort of snuggled up against him, and he put his arm around me. I looked up at him, and he smiled, and I just felt....loved and wanted. It was great. I knew what I wanted to do, so I did it. I reached up and kissed him. He smiled again, and hugged me closer. I felt so relaxed, and I was starting to get....excited, too. I whispered in Tony's ear that I was....really hard, and that I wanted him....to touch me. He asked me if I was really sure, and I said I was. I took his hand, and put it in my lap. He started to stroke me gently, through my trousers. Even that felt really good, but I guessed it would feel even better if he could touch right on my....dick, so I undid the button and zip, and pushed my bum off the seat so I could pull my trousers and undies down and take them off. Tony stopped, and just looked at me, looked at my....boy bits, like he'd never seen anything so nice in his life. I'm not very big down there, it's only about seven or eight centimetres long, even when it's hard, and I haven't got any hairs yet, but Chrissy told me he was like that until he was about 13, and then his started growing really quickly, so I'm not worried about it, or anything. In any case, like I said, Tony seemed to like it. He asked if he could touch it, so I said, yeah, of course, that was what I wanted him to do. He started rubbing it softly, between one of his fingers and his thumb, moving the skin backwards and forwards over the head part. I couldn't believe how good it felt, it was like I was itching inside, and Tony's hand was scratching the itch. Then he started concentrating on the underneath of it, where the skin joins, running his fingertip over that bit, and that felt even better! I started to get this really weird feeling inside me, sort of mega-ticklish, sort of like I really badly needed to pee, but I knew it wasn't that, I wasn't actually going to pee. Then it happened! It was like my insides were exploding, my dick felt like it was melting, it started jerking all over the place. It was soooo good, and it kept going for what felt like ages, then stopped for a few seconds, but Tony was still stroking gently, and it started again! It wasn't quite as good as the first one, and didn't last as long, but it was still pretty bloody fantastic! This time, though, it started to feel too tickly, so I asked Tony to stop for a minute. He cuddled me again, and asked if I'd ever had that feeling before, so I said no, but I wanted to have it again, really soon!! He explained what had happened, that I'd had an....orgasm - two, actually, he said sometimes boys who hadn't started making sperms yet could have more than one at a time, but once the sperms, and the stuff they swim in, start coming out, most older boys and men had to wait a while to recover in between. I was still just as hard as before, and the tickling had gone away, so I asked Tony to make me have another one. He said he was going to show me something different, and that I wasn't to worry, he wouldn't hurt me. And then he did something I couldn't believe! He knelt down in front of me, and put my dick in his mouth! Then he started licking and sucking it, and I really couldn't believe it, because it felt ten times better than when he was doing it with his fingers! It felt so good, I couldn't even think straight, it was like his mouth and my dick were the only things in the whole world. It went on getting better and better, until I didn't think I could stand it anymore. I nearly told him to stop, but then I started having another orgasm thing, and this one was huge! I felt like I was turning inside out! It soon got too tickly again, though, but Tony seemed to know, and he stopped sucking, and just held it still in his mouth for a few seconds, then let me go. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, and I nearly did both, but, in the end, I just put my arms around Tony's neck, and kissed him. He opened his mouth a bit, and I could feel his tongue on my lips, so I sort of copied him, and our tongues touched together softly. It felt really nice, really....sexy, like we couldn't get any closer together. Tony laid down on the rug in front of the sofa, and I laid on top of him. We kissed a few times, then he lifted my head up a little bit, and looked at me really seriously. He asked me if I was still sure about doing stuff, and did I know that I could say 'no' or 'stop' whenever I wanted. So I said I did, but I said that if sex was this much fun all the time, I never wanted to stop! We laid there and talked for a while, I asked Tony some questions, and he explained everything to me, told me the proper words, like penis, and semen, for sex things, but he told me the slang words too - I'd heard quite a few of them at school, but didn't know what some of them meant. My dick had gone soft for a while, but it started to get hard again, especially when Tony was stroking my back, and down onto my bum. I wriggled about a bit, and that was when I noticed his hard-on pressing against my leg. It made me feel a bit selfish, that I'd had all that fun and the great feelings, while he'd had nothing, so I asked him if I could see his....dick, and touch it, and make him feel good, too. He said he'd had loads of fun making me feel good, and that I never had to think I had to do anything for him, just because he'd done stuff for me. I told him I wanted to, though - I wanted to see what his looked like, apart from anything else. I'd had a few glimpses of older guys getting changed at the pool, and even my dad a couple of times, but I'd never really had the chance to properly look at grown-up bits. Especially not a grown-up with a hard-on. It looked pretty big from the bulge in his trousers, but Chrissy's bulge when he was horny was just as big. I asked Tony about that, and he said his wasn't that long, for a grown-up, a bit below average, but pretty fat. I asked if I could see it, and he said yes, if I wanted to, so I undid his trousers and pulled them down about halfway, and then pulled his undies down too. He had loads of hair down there, and his dick was just like he'd said, short but fat - and very hard. I squeezed it a bit, and he smiled, and then I started to stroke it, like he'd done to me before. My fingers only just about went all the way around it. There was some slippery stuff leaking out of the pee hole, and I asked Tony if that was semen, but he said no, that was something that the body made to help the penis slide in more easily when a man had sex, and that most people called it 'precum'. The actual semen came out when a man had his orgasm. I asked if he was going to have an orgasm, and he said he would soon if I kept making him feel as good as I was doing, but I didn't have to. I liked the feeling of his dick in my hand, though, it was hard inside, but the skin was really smooth and silky, and I liked the idea of making him feel good, too, so I said I wanted to carry on. He smiled again, and said thank you, and that he'd warn me when it was about to happen, because he thought it was going to be a big one, and it could get pretty messy. I stroked it a bit faster, and his breathing got faster, too, and then he said he was 'cumming', so I went even faster. He pulled his shirt up out of the way, and then his dick jerked, really strongly, in my hand, and this white gooey stuff shot out, way up in the air, then landed on my hand and his bits. It made me jump, and I took my hand away, but his dick kept on jerking, four or five more times, more of the stuff coming out with each jerk. The last couple were just little dribbles, though, and then it stopped. There was loads, it looked like, all over Tony's dick and hairs, and even up on his tummy. Tony got his breath back, and said thank you to me, said how great I'd made him feel. I sort of sniffed at the stuff that had gone on my hand, it smelled different from anything else I'd smelt before, and it made me wonder what it might taste like, so I just licked a tiny bit, but I didn't like it much. I told Tony, and he said if I didn't like it, I didn't have to have it in my mouth, that anyone doing any sex stuff should only do what they're comfortable with, and no-one should ever try and force them to do anything they weren't happy to do. I looked around for something to clean up with, but there wasn't much I could use, so I quickly went in the kitchen, even though I didn't have any trousers or undies on, and got some paper towels. We both cleaned Tony's stuff off of us, and then laid down and cuddled again. It was like hugging a big, warm teddy bear, I loved it, and I loved it when Tony started getting hard again, it was really sexy to feel his dick growing against my leg, it made me get really hard again, too. He gently put his hand down over my bum and between my legs, and stroked his fingers across the underneath of my balls and the bit between there and my bum hole, and even on my bum hole itself. It tickled, but it was such a nice tickle, it made me feel great. I asked him if he wouldn't mind sucking me again, because that was the best feeling I'd ever had, and he said of course he didn't mind, he loved making me feel good. He got me to slide up and sit on his chest, and we put some cushions on the floor to lift his head up a bit, and he got me in his mouth again. He went really slowly, made it last ages, and it felt fantastic, almost like I was having one long nearly-orgasm, but then it suddenly washed over me like a big wave, and I was....cumming, and cumming, and cumming some more. I think I had two orgasms again, but it was all just so good it was difficult to tell. After I'd finished, Tony just held me in his mouth for a long time, until it started to go soft, then he kissed the end of it, and let me go. My body still felt like there were echoes of the orgasm going through it, I felt all warm and tingly, and really sleepy. Tony whispered that we should get dressed, and then we could hug some more, if I wanted to, so we did, and laid back on the sofa. The next thing I remember, I woke up to see Si and Chrissy looking down at me, smiling. Tony was smiling, too, like he couldn't get any happier. Then it was time for Si and Tony to go, so we all walked down to the bus stop together. I really wanted to kiss Tony goodbye, but I knew I couldn't, not out in the street, so I just gave him a quick hug, like he was my uncle or something, and he gently mussed my hair. I said I wanted to see him again, really soon, and he said he wanted to see me again, too, and he'd see what he could work out. I nearly cried when the bus went, and he waved, but, when I thought about what had happened, and how much fun it had all been, I got a huge grin on my face, instead.
And now it's bedtime, and writing about today has made me really horny again. But now Tony has taught me how, I know exactly what to do about that!!
****
I'm going Christmas shopping with Si and Chrissy on Saturday afternoon - at least, that's what Mum and Dad think. What's really happening is that I'm going to meet up with Tony when he finishes work at lunchtime, and going down to his place for the afternoon, then coming back at teatime to meet up with Si and Chrissy again. They're going to do my shopping for me, I've made a list. I've managed to see Tony a couple of times since half term, including one really fun day when we all went to Si's house when his mum and dad were at work, but it's turned out to be harder than I thought for us to get together. Like Si said, Tony could really get in trouble over all this, so we have to be mega-careful. I'm really looking forward to Saturday, though. Si showed me the website, the one with the stories he read before he started doing sex stuff with Tony, some of the stories are really horrible, with boys getting hurt, and treated really badly, but some of them are really sexy, and loving at the same time, and that's how Tony is with me, and Si says he was just the same with him, too. There's one thing I really want to try, but Si said Tony probably won't do it. I've been sort of....practising, though, and it feels really good, so I'm going to ask him anyway. If he says no, then I'll have to accept that. I hope he says yes, though.
****
Yesssss! It's been another 'WOW!' day, it's been so much fun!
Like Si guessed, Tony did say no - at first, anyway. He said he would hurt me, badly, and there was no way he would ever do that. So I told him about my 'practice', about what I'd done, and how much I liked it, and how I really wanted to do it for real, with him. He said no again, but I could tell he was at least thinking about it, and that he probably did want to do it, really, but was just being kind and thinking of me and not wanting to hurt me. So I said let's try, and if it hurts, I'll tell you, and we can stop. He didn't say anything to that, so I sort of....took charge. He had some....lube stuff in the drawer of his bedside table, so I made myself and him really slippery, and I got on top. It was a bit fiddly trying to get everything lined up, but Tony helped me, and I began to sit down on his dick. It did hurt, quite a bit, when the head went in, but I tried not to let it show, because I knew Tony would make me stop - and I didn't want to. I just waited, like I did the first time I used the handle of the old hairbrush, until I got used to it, and then started slowly moving down, and letting Tony go deeper inside me. He rubbed against my sensitive spot, the something-gland, inside, it felt soooo good, I nearly cummed straight away, and it didn't hurt at all after that, it just felt brilliant, his dick felt hot and made me feel full, it was soooo sexy. Soon he was in all the way, and I could feel his hairs up against my bum and balls. His eyes were closed, and he was biting his lip, he looked like he was in heaven. I moved my bum up a little bit, and back down again, and Tony groaned, really loudly. I was afraid I was hurting him, so I asked him if he was alright, and he said he'd never felt anything better in his whole life. I was so proud of myself, making him feel so good, and it was feeling fantastic for me, too. I started going slowly up and down, Tony was sort of holding round my waist, helping me, and soon he was moaning all the time, and telling me how wonderful it felt. He was right, too, it was just amazing, every time I moved it felt like I was nearly cumming, and then I really did cum, it felt like I was cumming from right inside my bum, from that gland place. That set Tony off too, and he called out my name, really loudly, and then I felt his dick get even bigger and harder, it started jerking inside me, over and over again. I was still cumming, even after he finished, so I kept him inside me, as deep as he could go, and wriggled about to keep my cum going as long as I could. It lasted a few more seconds, but then it finally stopped. Tony's eyes were still closed, he looked half-dead, it was a bit scary for a minute, but then he smiled, sort of sleepily, like he'd just woken up from the best dream he'd ever had. He sort of sat up a bit, so he could hug me tightly, even while he was still inside me. Then he said something that I really didn't expect, but something that made me feel soooo good inside - he told me he loved me. I mean, I knew he liked me, and fancied me, but it was obvious that Si was the one he really loved. Just for a second, I nearly asked him whether he loved me more than Si, but I'm glad I stopped myself, because that wouldn't have been fair on Tony, to make him choose like that. So I just kissed him, and told him I loved him, too, and that I'd loved my first time having him inside me. Tony had started to go soft by this time, and sort of squidged out of me, and I suddenly felt really gooey inside, with all his stuff being up there, so I said I needed to go to the toilet. He agreed, and said we both needed a shower, too, so we headed off to the bathroom, me wrapped up in towels, and Tony in his dressing gown. I'd never had a shower with someone else before, so after I'd sat on the toilet and got rid of his stuff out of my bum, I asked Tony if we could shower together. He grinned, and said he'd love to. It was great fun, we played around a bit, splashing each other, and then he washed me, really gently and carefully, especially round my bum, which was a tiny bit sore, but nowhere near as bad as it was after my first time with the hairbrush, 'cos I was too rough with myself and didn't use enough slippery stuff that time. Then I washed Tony, too, and he must've liked the feeling, because he soon got hard. I asked him if he wanted to....put it inside me again, but he said no, it was my turn now. I couldn't believe my ears, I never thought he'd want me to do that to him, but he said he couldn't wait, so we went straight back to his room, because I couldn't wait, either, I was so excited to try it! It was a bit awkward finding the right position, with him being quite big, and me only having a little dick, but we managed it - he got on his hands and knees, and stuck his bum up as high as he could, I smeared the lube on him and me, and I put my dick straight in him. It felt great, especially when Tony used the muscles in his bum to squeeze me! I went in and out, over and over again, until I had a massive cum, and then a second one, not quite as big, but still amazing! I want to be able to make sperms, because it's part of growing up, but I'll miss not being able to have more than one cum at a time! After that, we just cuddled on Tony's bed for a while, and had a little sleep all wrapped up together. I woke up before Tony, all snuggled up in his arms, and I felt so safe and loved, it was wonderful. Those people who hate boylovers, who say they just hurt boys for their own selfish reasons, should have been me just then, they might understand things a bit better, that someone like Tony, who really loves boys, can make a boy feel so wanted and special and cared for. Really worth something. I have fantastic parents, and a great life, but still Tony gives me a sort of love my mum and dad couldn't.
I couldn't stop smiling when I met up with Si and Chrissy after Tony dropped me off back at the station near Si's house. They knew something special had happened, but they didn't try and find out what it was. I bet they guessed easily enough, anyway. Not that we keep secrets, Tony certainly didn't ask me to keep quiet - he never does, but he knows he doesn't have to - but we all know some things are private, so we don't ask. Even now, hours later, I'm still grinning my head off every time I think about what happened at Tony's - here I am, not even 12 until next week, and I'm not a virgin anymore. Either way!
****
Something awful's happened. Si is in Chrissy's room, crying and crying. I've been crying a lot, too, but I can't let anyone see, especially not Mum and Dad. Tony's died - he was at the football with Si yesterday, and had a heart attack, at least, that's what they think it was. I didn't know, but Si said Tony had had a heart condition for years, he had to take pills every day because of it. It was so terrible for Si, not just because he was there when it happened, but because when he went to the hospital, they wouldn't let him see Tony, because he wasn't family. And then Tony died in the middle of the night. I....I don't know what else to say....or what to do. I'm going to miss him so much.
****
Hi, Cam here again (not Cammy anymore, it sounded a bit....too....childish, I guess). I've just found this diary I wrote when I was 11/12 - it seems such a long time ago, even though it's only five years or so. I've never forgotten Tony, or what happened, though, and reading what I wrote at the time makes it seem like I was right back there again. I bet some people would think that now I'm older, I would look back at Tony, and hate him, think that he abused me, but I definitely don't. He was a wonderful, loving man, who cared so much about me, and the sex we had was what we both wanted, I enjoyed it so much, and I don't regret it at all. I've pretty much worked out now that I'm bisexual, I've had girlfriends and boyfriends, and had fun times with both. I've got a girlfriend, Livvy, at the moment, she knows I'm bi, and accepts that, and I think this time it might be more serious, a long term thing. Who knows, though? I'm still at school, doing my A-levels next year, I'm not thinking of getting married any time soon, or anything like that. Talking of which, Si and Chrissy are still together, they both got into Oxford, Si is doing Physics, Chrissy is doing Maths. They're engaged, hoping to get married, if the long-promised but still awaited marriage equality laws ever get passed. And they're still two of the nicest guys you could ever hope to meet, I love them both to bits.
I hope you enjoy reading my story, and I hope it makes you think, too - the stereotypes, about boylovers all being vile predators, are just plain wrong, as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, there are some awful people out in the world, who do want to hurt and abuse others, and they should be stopped, and, if necessary, punished. But there are others, and I'm certain Tony wasn't the only one, who really love, care for and cherish boys, and can give them wonderful life experiences, and not just in a sexual way, either. People should be judged on their merits, and not by unthinking reactions.
Love to you all
Cam xxxx
****
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
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